Realizing That My Wish Came True

This post will combine self-reflection with realizing that I have said everything into manifestation in one way or another.

Now it is related to my current relationship, the universe, and the result.

Let's start where it begins.

I was in elementary school, and I remember my teacher passing out a piece of paper, and she was talking about the future and the differences between a parent's pov and a child's pov. Like what they want in the future. The 2 questions that were one there were:

"What kind of person do your parents want you to be with in the future?"

This baffled me as a kid, because I wasn't thinking that far ahead, and I was like, "Why should that matter now?"

I remembered how my mom kept implying what kind of guys she would like me to get to know and marry. Ugh, I look back now, and I'm just shaking my head at the memories. It was looks and spiritual belief. She wanted someone who was well-maintained, had long hair, and knew how to take care of their hair. She wanted someone who is a Christian.

I remember feeling let down by her ideal mate for me. Sure, it was nice to have someone who is well kept and everything, but there was nothing about personality, nothing about the person inside. Then I remember thinking, Why Christian? Why does the person have to believe in just that religion? What's wrong with other religions?

I remember writing that I wanted someone who has a good sense of humor, of course, had good looks ("just a small town girl"). I didn't care about the religion part. As long as they had a good sense of humor and would somehow fit my mom's ideal person.

Fast forward a few years, and I get into anime, manga, and read fantasy books. I developed fictional crushes and wrote fanfictions and short stories. I still held onto the idea of someone who had a great sense of humor. But more thought went into the kind of guy I want to be with. Things like a family man, someone who was understanding, who had a good sense of what a family is.

Now I don't really count one of the relationships as a thing, because at that moment, during that time, I really don't know why I was with that guy. When it comes to the second relationship, in a way, the criteria were met, but it was not a healthy relationship. Mind you, I did learn a lot from that relationship, a lot about myself and what boundaries to set, a lot about my spirituality.

I wanted to be myself again.